ducksandbooks

We have a rule that Ben and I agreed on a while back, no wedding talk on Shabbat. We seriously broke that one last weekend when we went to a bridal show, all primed for free food, after a disappointing oneg after services last Saturday. Our synagogue has chosen to cut back on lunches to just snacks and juice if there’s no one to sponsor lunch. Yeah, I ate grapes. There was also chocolate cake, but I’m allergic to chocolate, so that was a no-go for me.

Back to the bridal show…. We’d be warned by friends that while the location it was held in looks ideal in photographs, it is actually in an office park and the photographers conveniently and artistically crop their photos to hide it. My favorite caterer, whom we can’t use because we’re looking at inclusive venues, was there. Yum!  There were also lots and lots of cake samples and cupcakes to be had. Nothing earth shattering, but some had better frosting than others.

We also got a $200 off coupon from the DJ service we are most likely to use and looked at some photographers’ collections. Sadly, we did not win the $500 cash prize, but Ben was OK with that because it was still Shabbat, even if we weren’t really observing it at that time.

Nothing Earth shattering to report other than I’m 100% happy with my decision to not carry flowers. I spent about 30 seconds looking at different bouquets and they are heavy, make my eyes itch, and smell floral. Yeah, I know, duh. But really, I don’t like floral stuff. Paper origami flowers, possibly with felt, yarn, and buttons here I come! I’d much rather carry a bunchy of crafty goodness in my hands than flowers that make me sneeze and itch. Who wants to sneeze and itch on their wedding day!?

(not me)

Oh, and I returned a bunch of shoes that didn’t work out for me. I’ve still got 2 pairs, one from Zappos and one from DSW that I’m deciding between and am trying to tell myself I don’t need to order more.

Dear Wedding Blogs,

Please include the location of the wedding that you are discussing. If you don’t, and I’m swooning over a vendor, I waste lots of time digging up where they are located only to be shot down by finding out that they’re somewhere like Flagstaff, Napa, Bar Harbor, or somewhere equally NOT in the Denver metro area.

Thanks,
-a grumpy bride-to-be

So I’m now deciding between two pairs of shoes. In the perfect world, I’d combine the two. I like the toe of one, and the heel strap on another. Bah.

I love the toe area of the Calyx Satin Flower Sandal, by Caparros and the ankle strap part of the Danni, by Caparros. In my perfect world, I’d be able to combine the two.

Danni, by Caparros

EW9848 via David’s Bridal – Taffeta jewel neck ball gown featuring side pockets. .

I can’t tell if I’m really digging this dress or not. I imagine it would be great short, but would I just look like a muffin with boobs from the front? OTOH, I totally dig the back, and for $399, with the opportunity to get it on sale through next week, I might find I think I might go try it on. But GEEZ to I hate David’s Bridal BARN. Ugh. It’s probably more of a polyester monstrosity than a thing of beauty in person, right?

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Thanks, that is all.

re: Say Yes to the Dress, a reality based TV show on TLC about Kleinfeld’s bridal salon in DC.

Just a short thought, but why would anyone want to wear a dress that doesn’t allow them want to spin and twirl like a little girl in a fairy costume? Some of those dresses appear to weigh more than the waify  brides do!

Also, some of those women must have very rich daddies. Walking into a shop and saying that your dress budget is $5k and then walking out having spent $9k to me says that your entire wedding budget is something like 1/2 a million USD. That’s WAY too rich for my blood. If I had that kind of money to spend, I’d hire a planner right now, and then just have more food and a real band instead of a DJ. I don’t think we’d change much about what we have in mind right now. OK, and maybe I’d ask my parents if we’d be allowed to pocket the change too. Just saying….

So I somehow got it in my head that it will be easier to pick out the silks for my wedding dress once I have shoes, since it’s more difficult to match fabric swatches to online photos. This meant that last night I spent almost $500 on 8 pairs of shoes. Yes, that’s more than I try and live off of each month in my current state of employment.

I’m hoping that of the 9 pairs of potential wedding shoes I ordered, at least 1 will make me feel like prancing around in the kitchen all afternoon. Once I have my dress and shoes and veil, it’s going to be difficult to stop myself from prancing around in my wedding outfit. I had a hard enough time staying out of Mrs. Lady Bear’s fluffy pink veil, back in July.

Many things were learned in my EPIC HUNT FOR WEDDING SHOES yesterday. Here’s my ranking of stores at the Flatirons Mall in Broomfield, CO.

1. Dillards had the most helpful staff (I was being assisted by their shoe manager, that may have had something to do with it). But, not a whole lot in the store in ivory and I hadn’t pre-perused their website because I don’t have a membership thing with them and just never thought about it.
2. DSW was the black sheep. I somehow forgot how awesome they are! OMG, they had half of shoes I ordered online last night (only $200). Most o them, they had in the store to try on, if only in black or some other pedestrian color. Sadly, my favorites are no longer available in ivory.* I also bought the most amazing, make me smile, happy Deena, ballet flats. How can you not love these?** ->
3. Payless had lots of trendy shoes that didn’t fit poorly! I’m always amazed when I can find something there, and I usually do, but then talk myself out of it. I did buy these (but am returning them after wearing them around the house for 20 min, in exchange for these mary janes) and seriously considered ordering these Lila Rose shoes, but the heel just seemed a tad far back on the shoe/foot to really feel balanced in. The shoe part fit beautifully and the custom dyed-to-order satins (for x2 the white pleather in-store version) felt and looked really nice.
4. Nordstrom’s shoe sales people seem a bit shy. But, they have WEDDING DRESSES! OMG, I knew they had them online, but I forgot that you can return them to the stores. My body double (with smaller boobs) ordered a whole bunch of dresses and returned them. In petite sizes! Do you people know how hard it is to find petite sizes?! The lady in the Specially Occasions dress department even went hunting for (and found) foundation garments for me to try on under the dresses.*** Sadly, none of the dresses fit me well enough to seriously consider, even for only $175 (or the woman who ordered them originally either).
5. Macy’s has lots of shoes, but they don’t carry all the colors of each line, check online before going. Their sales staff also seems less reliable, though maybe I just got the new girl and her indifferent and matronly compatriot. It IS however a good place to go and try things on because they have SO MANY SHOES. Even if they did manage to loose the right foot of the only size 6.5  pair of these shoes they had.

Zappos isn’t in the mall, so I can’t rank them. I’ve never ordered from them before, but I’ve heard people gush. I ordered 4 pairs for shoes for almost $300. Their prices were the same as everywhere else for the shoes that I saw elsewhere, but they didn’t have as many of the lower price range evening shoes in ivory. Here’s a smash-up of the shoes I ordered from zappos, plus some other fun stuff too:

Oh, you want more shoe porn? Me too! Too bad DSW doesn’t let polyvore grab pictures. Here are links and short descriptions to the shoes I can’t grab photos of:

• I tried these gorgeous ruffly ons in black and they’re beautiful and fit perfectly. I hope the ivory rocks too!
• I ordered these rosette sandals too, although they’re not available in stores to try on (in 6 and 6.5).
• These strappy/knotted front sandals look a lot like my prom shoes from BP in high school.

*I emailed zappos and DSW’s customer service agents to try and hunt them down for me. Neither one could find them, but both gave the same reason why: those shoes haven’t been made in ivory since 2008. Zappos did go on to tell me that the shoes came out in 2006 and are unlikely to be revived, though they’ll let me know if they find a pair.

**Oddly, the sparkly shoes are NOT Jones New York, they definitely say Nine West in the shoes and on the box. I got them for 40% off and had to buy jelly arches for them because they have NO support and I had to buy them a bit on the smaller side to fit and have been prancing around the house in them for the last 24 hours.

**note to self- when trying on wedding dresses a good strapless bra and spanxs are a must. Kelly green lowrise briefs are VERY obvious under white chiffon.

Today is the 3 year anniversary of our first date. So, we went back to where that was: Taste of Colorado. Roasted corn, rubbed with butter is amazing….. Anyway, while we were sitting (with Becca) chatting about nothing at Keegan Gerhart‘s demo some lady asked us if we were related, like brother and sister or something. Um, no. As far as I know, we don’t look much alike other than with my hair all sun bleached, our hair is about the same color in the shade.

I find this especially funny because just the other night we were being sappy dorks and staring at each other while thinking out loud: I wonder what our kids will look like. Light eyes? My high cheekbones? His wider jaw? My pointy-ish chin? His chin dimple? Big hands? My baby-size hands?

Either way, I wonder if we should worry about getting genetic testing done. I know neither of my parents are carriers for Tay-Sachs, but I also know there are other diseases that happen in higher percentages in the Jewish population as well. is it worth it to know what to worry about before we have to worry about it?

midnight confession: I used a website where you can upload 2 photos and morph them together to see what your children might look like, apparently we’re having hideous babies with neck growths and wagging tongues. OOPS.

I think we’re getting married at the St. Julien Hotel in downtown Boulder. The major decider: a weather backup plan. Although October is the sunniest month of the year in Boulder, I don’t want to bet 100% that it will be beautiful outside. Yes, we’re still planning on having an outdoor ceremony but if it rains we can all smoosh into 1/3 of the ballroom. They can set up something like 120 seats, and everyone else can stand around the edges/in the back. As far as I know, the ceremony will only be 30 minutes or so.

On thing I wonder is: Who is Saint Julien? Turns out, no one in particular (according to wikipedia), and I’m OK with that. I was just curious. Though Saint Julian is considered to be the saint of hospitality.

Now, I need to meet with the planner there again and hash out the financial details. As in, can we actually afford it? We’d be considered a budget wedding for this venue and would need to hire a coordinator for the ceremony, contact a rental company to get the fencing you see in the background of the photo below. That succesfully covers up Canyon Street and the Library. I love the library, but I’d rather have the focus on Ben, me, and the Flatirons behind us. Oh, and we’ll getting married in that back corner, with people in chairs on the lawn. That gazebo thing, SO not our style. Plus, why would we want to put our awesome chuppah that my mom will be quilting for us under a gazebo AND face away from the mountains?

from customweddingsofcolorado.com

I’m back from traveling South America with my family for almost a month. Wow, that was a long trip. I’m never going to leave the dude for a month again while I go traipsing around. I missed sharing things with Ben.

Like walking into a lamp post, having a systemic allergic reaction, oh, and actual the fun stuff too. Want to see the photos? Visit viola_in_peru on Flickr.